Apart At The Seams
by TheShyMonster
Summary: Stuck in a rut couple Severus and Hermione were in a potion accident and suddenly they are back in time in 1981. With younger Snape, the first war and Severus jumping uncontrollably through time their relationship struggles even more.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Do not own obviously, because if I did Snape wouldn't be as old, so my obsession wouldn't be as weird… still pretty weird even if the age gap was smaller…but hey, it's a step towards sanity.

-

Hermione clutched the thin red plastic of her toothbrush in anger. Her fist curled up around the tiny item until her nails were digging in to the pale flesh of her palms. This was just too much. He couldn't really expect her to just accept this. The offending man stared back at her stubbornly from across the room, his cheeks flushed with anger and his long, limp black hair falling into his face. It was just a toothbrush for God's sake; it wasn't as if she was trying to move in with him!

"I refuse to have your worthless, tacky junk cluttering up my quarters…"

"Severus! It is a toothbrush! Hardly the end of the world." They continued to face off, at either ends of the long grey rug that covered the dusty floorboards of Severus' living room.

The world continued to move around them, the sun inching across the small, enchanted window, shadows following it obediently across the tiny dark room and Severus' grandfather clock ticking amicably next to him but neither could feel the movement of time. It was as though they were locked out of the world and were completely oblivious to the life outside of their argument. The sheriff and the bandit. Pistols at dawn.

Hermione itched to brush her hair out of her eyes, one irritating curl had drifted down from the mass pulled back out of the way by a red barrette and was trying to distract her. She clenched her fists tighter to resist – she had to remain emotionless, she had to win.

"What would people say?" Severus asked suddenly, a glint in his eye. It was obvious that he thought it was only a matter of time before he was victorious. Hermione's brown eyes narrowed and she flicked her head to the side, to push the curl away but trying to appear cavalier.

"No one would find it."

"Oh but what if they did." Severus took a step closer, a smirk growing. "I might be caught unaware and blurt everything out about this whole… sorry…affair." He continued to slowly approach her, his black robes dragging along the ground. Hermione's eyes remained trapped on his like a doe caught in the headlights of a sleek, poised Porsche, reading to strike her down with effortless grace. Spindly fingers reached up and pushed her dark curls behind her ear and he leant down to whisper with an air of conspiracy in her ear. "_What would Potty and Weasel say?" _Hermione frowned and took a large step back; she stared at him stubbornly in the eye, and the mist of seduction that had surrounded him so suddenly yet again, died.

"Would you stop calling them that? They are my friends and I have told you a million times not to." Severus rolled his eyes and pulled her toothbrush from her grip suddenly with a quick tug, Hermione tried to protest but within seconds he had vanished it back to her quarters.

"And I have told you a million times to stop trying to change me, you silly woman." Hermione felt a flash of anger crash up and down her spine, sending shocks of fury through her whole body.

"We have been dating for three years and expecting you to pretend not to hate my best friends is trying to change you." She said harshly, glaring up at his unimpressed black eyes. Severus raised his hands up to examine his fingers, his face unreadable.

"You knew what you were getting yourself into. We agreed. No pathetic little announcements to friends or family. No public displays of affection. No. Attemps. To. Change. Me." The couple silently fumed standing only inches apart on the grey, faded rug until Severus couldn't take the tension any longer. "If you wanted a boyfriend you knew you had _Weasel_." Hermione laughed sourly and raised one hand to her heart and smiled at Severus.

"Oh yes of course. _I _had Weasley! Why can't you just let it go? We were teenagers." Severus scowled at her and span around, walking away to watch his grandfather clock tick.

"Don't act innocent. I know you fucked him, don't deny it." Hermione pulled on her hair with renewed frustration – this argument seemed to be happening more and more often.

"Why won't you believe me when I say that Ron and I never slept together?" she asked incredulous. Hermione threw herself into a dusty armchair by the fireplace and picked at her dull blue robes. She had a history class to take soon – she really didn't have time for this.

"Because it is so pathetically obvious." Severus span around and stalked towards her again, coming to a sharp stop at her feet and resting his hands on her armrests. He leaned down until they were once again nose to nose. His voice rose to a ridiculous, high pitch as he imitated her. "_Oh Ronald, of course you're handsome. Oh Ronald I'm sure there's a girl out there for you! Oh Ronald, have you been working out? Oh Ronald, just take me now." _He pushed off viciously from the armrests and folded his arms. Hermione raised an eyebrow, in the perfect imitation of his look, a trait she had picked up from him and that she knew infuriated Severus more than anything else.

"And I'm the pathetic one?"

"Yes. Glad we're on the same level." Hermione's glare intensified and she stood up from the armchair, forcing him to retreat or risk getting a face full of angry Gryffindor.

"You have no right to be so jealous. Ron and I are just close and he doesn't even know we're seeing each other." Severus rolled his eyes.

"I am not jealous. I **am** ashamed of having such a pathetic _girl_ in my bed though." Hermione nodded along with his words in fake sympathy.

"You say that as though you'd rather be alone, Severus. Yet we both know you'd do anything to make me stay. For example hexing Remus because you thought I was leaving you for him." Severus paled in the early morning sun remembering the embarrassing incident, which had been hard to explain away. Remus was still suspicious about the nature of their relationship no matter how many times Hermione lied about its platonic status.

"That was not jealousy. He was in my way."

"You need to stop being so possessive." Severus stormed towards her and wrapped his fingers around the back of her neck, pulling her in.

"I am not possessive. You are just mine and you flaunting yourself at other men just slightly puts me on edge."

"Yours?" Hermione mocked, untangling herself from his fingers. "Now when did you turn into Ron?" Suddenly arms were wrapped tight around her waist and Severus was everywhere.

"I will kill the Weasel." He said with an acid tone before he bit down viciously on her neck. Hermione shrieked and pushed him away.

"See! This is pathetic." Severus span away and stormed from the room. Hermione followed apprehensively until he disappeared down into his lab. Hermione paused at the top of the dark, gloomy staircase. This was the one part of Severus' quarters that was completely off-limits. Too dangerous. Too forbidden. Did she really dare break the biggest rule in their relationship? With a determined angry nod Hermione rushed down the stone steps, her sensible black shoes making a loud slapping noise with every step.

Severus was bent low over a black cauldron, poking at the mixture angrily with his wand, purple mist bubbled inside and as Hermione appeared at he bottom of the steps he straightened out, his face turning red with anger.

"**How dare you come down here? It's too dangerous**…" the cauldron began to quake, Severus' anger flooding the room with accidental magic.

The eruption was beautiful.

The purple, bubbling mist rose up into the air, forming a perfect arch and headed straight for the couple, quaking in fear. Suddenly the force of Severus throwing himself across her and the gravitational potential of six gallons of potion slammed Hermione on to her back. The air pushed out of her lungs in one sharp breath and her vision blurred. The potion overwhelmed her senses as it invaded her mouth, nose and ears. She spluttered desperately for air but none came and soon, the world began to dim. She struggled on, the dead weight of Severus pushing her further into the stone. His lack of movement was the last thought that crossed her mind before the darkness stole all conscious thought away.

-

A.N Ok new fic. If you have me on your author alert and are thinking "Huh? Who the hell is ShyMonster" I used to go by 1Malone, HummingBird, ThatReallyQuietGirl, HighOnMyMuse and ThatNameIsTaken… so yeah…changed it again.

Hope you like.

This fic will be my longest ever (the pressure is already getting to me) and I'm trying to keep the fluff to a minimum. One chapter on average a week hopefully because you know, bucket loads of AS Level work.

Thanks for reviewing.


	2. Chapter 2

Hermione hung back cautiously in the blurry borders between sleep and conscience, tentatively trying to gage her surroundings without opening her eyes, her mind still half-trapped in slumber. The ground below her burned the exposed flesh or her calves, face and hands as they pressed hard against the icy rough surface. A soft, ticking sensation across her neck and face told her that her hair had come loose and was wrapped around her and the chilly air pressing in on her was uncomfortable in her thin robes. Brown eyes peaked open at her surroundings, taking in the rough stone floors and looming darkness of the room. After a quick mental assessment that nothing was broken, she pushed herself up into a slanted sitting position, wincing at the ache in her limbs. Hermione squinted up at a large black cauldron and a few make shift tables nearby as her eyes got used to the gloom. It looked a bit like Severus' lab…  
Hermione gasped and pushed herself up onto her knees, looking around frantically for Severus. Images of the potion exploding and being slammed into the ground swam before her eyes.  
A particularly dark cloud of black on the stone floor caught her eye suddenly and she quickly crawled over to where Severus lay motionless on the ground. Hermione pulled her wand swiftly from her sleeve and muttered a hurried lumos, coating Severus in bright, yellow light and Hermione checked his pulse with shaking fingers. The steady thump under her fingertips sent a wave of relief through her body and she slumped, exhausted, against his torso. The constant beat of his heart against her ear calmed her until her eyelids began to droop again.  
Slow, quiet footsteps fell in time with the beat as the room darkened even more and her wand rolled from her grip, the light dying as it hit the stone ground. Eyes shut Hermione began to drift back to sleep the exhaustion from the accident overcoming her again.

As her mind slipped away Severus Snape stepped into his lab, his wand casually flicking to the left to light the torch on the far wall. He thumbed through the pile of seventh year essays in his hands and glanced at the cauldron bubbling merrily in the corner…  
"Stupefy!" he shouted at the two figures lying on his floor. The essays fluttered out of his light grip as he strode across the stone floor towards the intruders. With the point of his boot he pushed the curly hared woman off of a dark hared man, staring pensively at the two, shocked to hear soft snores coming from the small figure of his strange female intruder.  
Snape hooked his ankle around a stool nearby and sat cautiously, not taking his eyes off of the couple. A white doe erupted from his wand, cantering off to Dumbledore with the news of the two suspect death-eaters. Snap peered closely at the man, his hair falling forward into his eyes as he contemplated the unconscious man. Tall, pale, dark hair, large nose. Snape reached up and tentatively felt his own nose, his eyes following the same path on the man.  
The hurried footsteps of the Headmaster clambering down his staircase woke him from his musings and he turned to the stairwell as the concerned man burst into his lab, his beard over his shoulder, cheeks red with exertion and his lime green hat askew.

"Where are they?"

-

Hermione struggled against tight bonds strapping her wrists down. Her mind was fuzzy and her body fizzed with the after-effects of a stupefy charm.

Standing above her, looking down with a mixture of contempt and concern were two very familiar men.

Albus Dumbledore and Severus Snape were much younger than when she had last laid eyes of them.

"You have been administered with a strong truth serum and you **will **tell us everything you know about your master." The headmaster looked terrifying in the half-light of the room, the one solitary lamp alight sending eerie shadows across his face and beard making him look sinister.

"Headmaster? Wh-wh-at's going on? Severus?" she asked, looking up into their faces pleadingly. What were they doing?

"How did you get on school grounds?" neither face showed the compassion she wanted and with shame Hermione felt the prick of tears behind her eyes.

"Like I normally do!" her voice began to shake harder, her confusion fuelling the tears. "What are you doing? Why am I tied down?" Hermione began to struggle against the binds around her wrists again.

"You are being held here as a terror suspect. We have not handed you over to the authorities yet. I suggest you start talking." Snape' smooth voice washed over but it offered little of the comfort it usually did.

"A terror suspect? What on earth are you talking about? I'm a history teacher!" The situation was just so incredulous and confusing she began to get hysterical. "Let me go! I am not a terror suspect! Severus, Albus you know I would never be a death eater." Hermione struggled with her binds with a renewed vigour as the Headmaster and Snape shared a look.

"What is your name?" Albus asked slowly, his fingers knotted together and he looked down at the strange young woman pensively. Hermione glanced at him, her face twisted into an expression of disbelief.

"Hermione Granger, you're History of Magic Professor. Headmaster, you know me."

"How long have you been a Death Eater?" Snape prompted, his face was as expressionless as always but missing a few key wrinkles and a small scar near his left eye. What had happened to him?

"I am not a Death Eater!" Hermione protested, "Look at my arm, for Pete's sake." The Headmaster and Snape shared another look before Snape swooped forward and pulled the sleeve of her blue robes up. Her pale, tattoo free arm was suddenly illuminated by the little light there was in the room.

"Curious..." the headmaster said to himself, he brushed one long, bony finger across the empty expanse of skin.

"What is this about? I haven't done anything. What even happened? The last thing I remember is the potion exploding and you jumping on me Severus." Snape stepped back quickly, shaking his head slowly at the headmaster.

"I have never met this woman before in my life." Hermione stared at him aghast.

"I know we're pretending to be only friends, Severus, but claiming to have never met me, especially to the Headmaster, is taking things a bit too far."

"Honestly Headmaster." Snape said curtly. Panic began to itch at the back of Hermione's mind, threatening to take over her exhausted mind. Dumbledore turned his piercing gaze to Severus, after a short pause he nodded and turned back to Hermione.

"How do you know my Potion Master, Miss Granger?" Hermione stared incredulously at him again but decided maybe was the time to humour him.

"He taught me for seven years at this school and we have been in a hidden relationship for three." Hermione hoped their knowledge that she was under the effects of Snape's truth serum would get her untied.

"Well, Miss Granger, that is very interesting, for Severus has not even been teaching at this school a year yet... and neither he nor I have any idea who you are." Suddenly the setting, their questions and many other aspects of the sudden Spanish Inquisition began to unscramble, piecing themselves together and slotting themselves away in neat little compartments in her mind. Culminating in the realisation that she had gone back in time.

The panic took over.

Knowledge that she had made such a huge jump back in time was horrifying and she began to struggle again. If her hasty, confused maths was correct she had been taken back to 1981, Severus' first year teaching at Hogwarts. Wait... where was Severus?

The man standing above her obviously wasn't him. Or was? But was not the right one?

"Where is Severus?" she asked suddenly, Snape and the Headmaster looked at each other in alarm. "Where is he?" she prompted, if she had come back then he must have too.

"Miss Granger, he is right here..."

"No, you're not him. Or well... are you? But you're not... at the same time?" two confused faces continued to stare back at her. "The man I arrived with." she said quietly. If Severus wasn't there everything would be ten times worse. Understanding dawned in their eyes and the Headmaster flicked his wand at the dark depths of the rest of his office. Flames bloomed in the torches around the room one by one until they revealed an unconscious Severus, slumped back in an arm chair, his arms bound magically to the floor. A choking gasp of shock jumped out of Hermione when she saw him, deathly pale and glistening with sweat, tossing and turning in distress. She tried to stand and rush towards him but couldn't, courtesy of the magic holding her in place.

"We have removed the stupefy charm but he refuses to wake up. He will be seen to by Madam Pomfrey when we are done here." Hermione nodded, unable to take her eyes off of him, their argument running over and over through her head. What if he was really hurt? She had been so horrible to him. "Now kindly explain who you are and what you are doing here."

As Hermione launched into an explanation of their accident and travelling back in time Snape walked over to his apparent counter-part.

God, he was ancient.

The obvious similarities between them were even more apparent now and he reached out a shaking hand to touch the sleeping face of himself in nineteen years time. He glanced back at the woman he was supposedly in a relationship with and frowned; she was as young as he was now. Twenty-one-years-old and in a relationship with a forty-year-old. Severus shook his head at his sleeping older self and turned away, he nodded to Dumbledore and strode from the room.

A.N – Another chapter and sort of within a week? By week I meant Monday-Sunday not within seven days of the first update. That doesn't make sense...

Anyway thanks for reading and for anyone thinking "Oi you!Hermione was a bit out of character." All I can say was that she was emotionally drained and needed to panic a bit.

By the way 40-year-old Severus Snape will be known as Severus and 21-year-old Severus Snape will be known as Snape.

Oh my God. I've just re-read this and it's actually terrible and now I rather hate myself. But despite that because I am glutton for punishment (from my future self discovering this in years to come. But then whatever because that's future Becky's problem) I will post it as my chapter 2.


	3. Chapter 3

Under the slanting roof of the Three Broomsticks is a small and hot room with cracked walls and ceilings. Hermione Granger lay on her back in the small wooden bed standing in the centre of the small room. The sheets twisted around her legs more with every slow movement. Tossing and turning all night had culminated in her entrapment in the cocoon of light covers.

A bright ball of fire was now catching the corner of her eye as it peeked over the wooden windowsill of the small window so Hermione sighed and twisted in the sheets one more time to look at the sunrise. In the distance the castle loomed up above the lake and Hermione's imagination flew up out of the bed, the room and Hogsmeade until she reached the hospital wing where Severus was lying unconscious still. The unfamiliar warmth of summer had been unbearable through the dry night and that along with Severus' absence had made for a restless night's sleep.

Loneliness suddenly washed over Hermione and she jumped up from the bed in discomfort. Without the familiar, warm presence of Severus next to her being in bed just felt... wrong.

As the sun climbed higher across the window Hermione sat on a small high-backed wooden chair in silence. With shaking hands resting lightly on her knees, she fought back tears in the small room, images of Severus unconscious fluttering before her eyes.

-

The Three Broomsticks was quiet in the early morning summer heat. Only a few overnight guests sat nursing cups of tea and coffee in the comfortable wooden booths, consciously as far away from the bar as possible. Hermione noticed with trepidation the small group they were obviously avoiding made up of old wizards that were already drinking. Really? At eight in the morning?

Hermione slid into a chair at a small round wooden table and plucked the breakfast menu out of the small metal holder at the centre. Her stomach lurched at the images of eggs, toast and bacon that were charmed to project up at her. Hurriedly she closed the menu, and laid the salt and pepper shakers on it's front cover, just in case it decided to jump open again.

"What can I get you, Miss?" A skinny little thing with glasses arrived at the table and smiled an awkward self-conscious smile. Hermione peered closer at the young woman in her twenties and baulked when she realised that it was a young Madam Rosmerta serving her.

"Erm..." Ron would actually die if he saw the voluptuous and sexy pub owner as she did at that moment. "Tea, please." Rosmerta smiled shyly and walked away with an awkward under-confident shuffle, leaving Hermione to stare after her in a daze. Wow. Hermione glanced around at the other guests at the pub. No one particular stood out among the small number of people as familiar and she sent one last disdainful look at the group of men who were already well on their way to the bad side of trousered.

Rosmerta returned with a small china cup of tea and laid it gently in front of her, motioning to the sugar at the centre of the table with her free hand. Hermione smiled at her and watched her walk away again in confusion. How on earth did such a skinny, anxious thing turn into the seductress she was in the future?

Hermione shook her head and turned to look at her tea. Her fingers slowly reached down and pinched the handle between her fingers, raised it to her lips and took a slow sip. A disgusting bitter taste greeted her tongue and Hermione struggled to choke down the vile waste of ingredients. Her coughing and looks of horror roused the interest of a tall man walking down the steps as he rubbed sleep out of his eyes.

Hermione dropped the tea cup back onto its saucer and glared at the small white china. That may be the worst thing she had ever tasted.

"Yes... this place is wonderful but Rosy can't make tea to save her life." a deep, slow voice breathed into her ear as the tall man whispered to her subtly, hiding his comment from Rosmerta, who was lurking nearby.

Hermione jumped and twisted to look around back at the man, ready to tell him off for having no sense of a stranger's personal space. But her angry comment froze on her lips as she stared into the hazel eyes of Remus Lupin. Her mouth dropped and she blushed darkly, realising she had been about to tell off her professor.

"Yes, it's not exactly the nicest thing I have tasted recently." Hermione quickly turned back around in her seat and began to stir the tea nervously. A 21-year-old Remus was not something she needed to deal with.

"That's putting it nicely. Rosy is a lovely girl and can make gorgeous coffee but there is just something about her tea that... I don't know... died?" Hermione snorted with laughter and Remus grinned down at her as he walked around her chair and leant against her table with one hand.

"It's not that bad." Remus leaned down and whispered with an air of conspiracy in her ear again.

"Yes. Yes, it really is." Hermione raised the cup to her lips and took another sip, straining to keep her face straight. The disgusting liquid slid down her throat like cement. Remus watched her with an amused twitch of his lips and a raised eyebrow.

"That was rather cutting your nose off to spite your face, wasn't it?" Hermione paused and was suddenly struck by a coughing fit as her body tried to expel the poison. "What were you trying to approve by drinking more?" Remus asked as he began to walk backwards, away from her table toward the bar. Hermione shrugged at his retreating figure and watched him slip under the bar and begin to make tea. Rosmerta didn't bat an eyelash. Hermione contemplated his question as she watched him finish the tea, stirring the final mixture with his wand pensively.

"I thought maybe it got better the more you drank?" Remus laughed and began to walk back over to her, a mug of tea in each hand, Hermione noticed that he had stuck his wand, still damp from the tea, behind his left ear.

How immature, she thought to herself, and how very unlike him.

Remus stole the seat opposite her and placed the mug down carefully, but it still overflowed and some of the delicious looking tea cascaded down the side of the thick blue mug.

"I'm Remus, by the way."

"Hermione."

"Pleased to meet you." Remus' grin was contagious and Hermione felt herself succumbing and smiling along with him.

Where was this happy, young man in 20 years? This Remus sipping tea and calling Rosmerta over to their table looked much younger and carefree than her Remus. Thicker light brown hair and fewer scars across his face although the wrinkles were starting to show and his hair was greying already. A glance at his shabby robes showed a man in desperate need of a good job but it was nothing compared to how her good friend looked during the second war.

The calculations had plagued Hermione whilst struggling to sleep the night before. The Severus Snape that belonged in this time was twenty-one years old and Hermione guessed that must mean that he and Remus were a few years out of school and only a few months away from the deaths of the Potters.

"So what brings you to Hogsmeade?" Remus asked casually, after taking a sip of his tea and motioning to her to do the same.

"Business at Hogwarts." she said quietly, an image of Severus swimming into her mind again.

"Oh! Me too." Remus grinned again and Hermione stared back at his in confusion. A war was on so why was he so chipper? "Are you staying here?"  
"Yes. It seemed like the best option."

"So what kind of business." A raised eyebrow showed the mild curiosity was much stronger than it appeared.

"Oh, just stuff with the Headmaster." Remus' smile dropped slightly when he realised she wasn't going to continue.

"Me too. I have to go up in a while. Are you...?"

"Yes. I should be going up soon too." A casual silence filled the air as the two continued to drink their tea.

"Look here, I'm very sorry for disturbing you this morning. But I just had to talk to someone before..." he motioned to the bar where the early-morning drunkards were getting rowdy, "they dragged me into conversation again." He grinned sheepishly and pulled a small novel out of his robe's inner breast pocket. "I can just disappear into this if you would rather ignore me." Hermione shook her head, she hadn't realised until then how nice it was to talk to Remus feeling guilt-free about what Severus would think.

"No, it's fine... wait... is that Jane Eyre?" A slight ruddy colour bloomed on Remus' cheeks.

"Erm... yes... rather. I know it is more of a girl's book..."

"I love Jane Eyre. Is it your first read?" Hermione's eager expression made Remus chuckle and he slipped the well-worn book open to show her where he was in the book.

"No, I've read it a few times before but recently I felt the urge to read it again."

"What's your favourite bit?" Remus looked distressed and looked around nervously. He flicked the pages until he was nearly at the end of the novel and pointed to a well worn page. Mr. Rochester's jealousy of St John had been bordered with a thin grey pencil line, obviously for easy access.

"Well Remus, now I'm really glad you disturbed me this morning."

-

Hermione and Remus continued to discuss the novel an hour later as they walked through the halls of Hogwarts. They had been pointed in the direction of the Hospital Wing for Dumbledore and they were on their way there now.

"... could say that Jane's aunt was jealous of Jane for holding the attention of her husband. Maybe she could have seen it as Jane stealing attention away from her children... Severus!" the hospital wing doors had flung open during Hermione's pondering and suddenly she could see Severus sitting up in bed and awake. Hermione ran forward away from Remus until she reached the long white bed Severus was sitting on, talking to the Headmaster. Tears clouded her vision as she threw her arms around his neck in relief. He was awake. He was okay. Everything was better.

Severus struggled in her grip and ripped her arms away from him.

"Control yourself." he hissed at her and pushed her away slightly with a glare. Hermione fought to regain her composure as Severus ignored her in favour of continuing his intense discussion with the Headmaster. Thoughts of guilt began to plague her. Was this the universe's way of punishing her for having fun with Remus when Severus was ill?

Remus began to walk towards her patting his pockets looking for something. His fiddling soon produced a scrap of parchment, ripped from the bottom of his Three Broomsticks bill and a quill with a drop of ink drying inside.

"If you feel like some decent tea and sadly some not so decent conversation about the book of your choice... this is my floo." He finished writing his address with a flourish of the shabby brown feather and passed her the scrap of parchment. "If a dark haired idiot answers just ignore him and don't accept anything liquid, no matter how many times he assures you it's just water." Hermione raised an eyebrow inquisitively. "Sirius just doesn't understand why it's wrong to ply guests with alcohol before they've even stepped out of the fire grate." Remus smiled sheepishly at her and walked the perimeter of Severus' bed to murmur something in the Headmaster's ear. When he straightened up he sent her one last grin and a touch of a fake peaked cap before he walked from the wing.

Hermione flopped into a small metal hospital bed chair next to Severus' bed and waited for the two men to finish their discussion in hushed tones. The floo address was safely put away in her pocket and she stared pensively out of the window.

Shortly the Headmaster excused himself and he walked quickly from the room leaving her with a stiff, silent Severus.

"Are you feeling well..."

"You just can't help yourself, can you?" his voice cut and was icy cold in the stifling heat of the hospital wing.

"Excuse me?" the weather was starting to get to her and that added to his coldness was making her temper easily aggravated.

"Throwing yourself at him in any time frame." Remus? He was angry about Remus?

"What are you talking about?" she asked, her temper starting to flare more. She stood from her chair and whirled around to look at him.

"We've been here a matter of hours and you're already batting your eyelashes at the wolf." Hermione nodded slowly, trying to control her anger, before she turned and walked calmly away. She was nearly at the door by the time Severus managed to choke out anything. "You're leaving? You can't leave! I only just woke up." Hermione whirled around on the heels of her sensible heels and glared back at him.

"Well seeing as I'm such a _whore_ I think I'll go throw myself at Remus some more."

-

A.N – What do you think? It's a bit longer than the others but meh. I decided to show young Remus Lupin as happier than he is the book series because even though the war is on he still has his friends and he's doing okay at work.


	4. Chapter 4

The little cottage that housed the Order of the Phoenix was hidden deep in Sherwood Forest. A small, thatched building made of stone Albus had stumbled upon it in his younger days. The kind of house that only really looks at home on the pages of fairy tales.

Over decades it had fallen into disuse and disrepair, some of the magic of old dulling under a barrage of creepers and fallen branches. Until suddenly Albus he had remembered the small cottage of his boyhood in a flash of inspiration and within days it had been bought, furnished and warded to become the Headquarters of the Order. This was the secret hideaway that Hermione and Severus were taken to in the middle of the night. An army of young, naïve witches and wizards, wands out and crunching leaves muffled by silencing charms traipsed through the undergrowth.

Hermione gasped silently to herself as she tried to push Severus over a stubborn branch. He was grumbling to himself in the hospital wing's wheelchair – his strength still failing him from their travels into the past. The silence between them was tense as the other members of the Order laughed and joked about quietly among themselves, they were like schoolchildren, excited about a big assembly – tears pricked Hermione's eyes when she thought of what would become of their smiling faces.

Hermione finally managed to push Severus' wheelchair forward with the help of a burly man she didn't recognise. Severus' rigid posture and the cold looks he constantly sent her were definitely not helping her melancholy mood.

Once Hermione had pushed Severus through the slanting door of Headquarters they were shoved along a thin corridor with the tide of other new recruits. Hermione sighed gratefully when the stuffy white walls opened up into the meeting room.

Despite most of the walls in the cottage having been knocked down and the first floor taken out, the room was still cramped with hot, uncomfortable bodies piled on top of each other. People were twisting on to chairs, tables, rugs and some people were even clinging on to the windowsills in the far corner. As Hermione tried to push Severus a little further into the masses two men on the windowsill spotted her,

"Hey Hermione! Over here!" A silly lop-sided grin adorned Remus' face as he beckoned her over. His face was reddened by the heat of the room, his stuffiness not helped by his thick jeans and holey worn brown jumper. Hermione dithered silently, stuck between escaping Severus' horrid mood and the guilt she would feel for deserting him. Severus snorted in Remus' direction, and looked pointedly away with a smirk, his hand reaching up to wrap around her wrist. It was the only slight piece of affection she had received from him for days but the touch infuriated her. He was smugly assuming she wouldn't leave him to talk to Remus. Angrily, Hermione ripped her wrist from his grip and stormed away towards the window, ignoring his choke of surprise.

There was a maze of spare limbs across the floor and Hermione quickly picked her way between the various order members, apologising for crushed toes and fingers as she hurried.

As she reached the window Remus was shoving his friend to the side playfully so she'd have space to just about squeeze on to the narrow piece of wood with them. The friend was sitting slumped forward, his shoulders hunched and a retro bowler hat hanging low over his eyes. His long legs, loose in khaki shorts, stretched out in front of him, taking up unneeded and valuable space. A pocket watch ticked quietly in the breast pocket of his messy, half-unbuttoned shirt and long thin fingers twirled a wand absent-mindedly.

"Hermione! It's great to see you." Remus said happily to her before he turned to his friend again, "Seriously move up, stop being grumpy." The friend grouchily shifted a few more inches, hissing as his bare arm was pushed up against the cold stone wall. A flash of stubble and blood-shot eyes told Hermione everything she needed to know.

"Hungover?" she asked, and received a tortured groan in return.

"This is Sirius, ignore him; he overdid it a bit last night." Hermione watched Remus fuss over Sirius like a mother hen. He pulled his shirt closed and kicked his flip-flop covered feet to the side, shocking Sirius in to pulling them in and giving two order members on the room more space. When he was finished Remus turned back around and gave her another of his infectious grins.

"Excited?" Hermione was confused, what on earth was there to be excited about. This translated quickly to Remus who laughed good-naturedly.

"Oh God I know," he said sheepishly, "We're very immature; the war is still a bit of an adventure to us." Hermione smiled stiffly at him and turned away, it was unbearable to see his happiness. Guilt pinched at her heart and tears pricked her eyes as she fought the dry lump suddenly in her throat. This was pathetic, how was she supposed to survive here if she couldn't take a sad man's happiness?

Suddenly a high-pitched screeching filled the room. Gasps and shouts of surprise from the bodies packed into the room flooded Hermione's system along with the high, long whistle. Fast movement next to her caught her eye, Sirius had raised his hands to his ears and was gritting his teeth against the pain.

"Attention! Thank you. ATTENTION!" Albus Dumbledore stood at the front of the room, his long thin spangle coated robes catching the light filtering through the high windows. The meeting began and Hermione sagged back against the window trying to pay attention.

But everything Severus did snatched her away and she struggled to hear the Headmaster's voice. She felt each shift of his body in the wheelchair, every puff of breath to flick his heavy, sweat-slicked hair out of his eyes and despite the boom of Dumbledore's voice Hermione swore she could hear every laboured, tired breath that passed through his thin lips. He was obviously horridly uncomfortable. Hermione's palms itched with sweat and anticipation, she wanted to be by his side, she wanted to grasp his hand in hers, she needed to help him somehow. From across the room it was torture to see the casual, curious looks the order members threw at him.

It was obvious he shouldn't be there.

An interlude came all to slowly and she felt people standing tentatively, stretching aching backs and twisting stiff hips, delighting in the clicks and release after so long in such awkward positions. Sirius instantly stumbled for the darkest part of the room but Remus caught him by his creased collar and together they dragged him over to the buffet table to get some food inside him, hoping to counter-act the immense amount of alcohol that was torturing him.

A short while later an ominous presence standing behind her made the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. Snape, in all his 21-year-old glory reached around her carefully for one of the tall glasses of water she was standing in front of.

"Eurgh Snivellus! Please, I feel sick already; I don't need to see your greasy fingers copping a feel of random strangers. I know it's the only way you..."  
"Sirius!" Remus' shout of horror wasn't enough to stop the queasy, hungover man. He stumbled forward, his bowler hat tumbling off as Remus tried to reach out to grab him.

"Well I know you can't have Lily but must you insist on..."

"Sirius stop." Remus' smile had gone and he wrapped thick pale fingers around Sirius' upper arm tugging him away harshly.

"Oh but Remus I'm just getting started! Oh how I've missed this." Sirius licked his dry lips in anticipation and Hermione looked in horror at the shaking hands clinging to Severus' glass of water. "Harry is such a cute kid. Has her eyes but oh doesn't he look like James? He's going to be a right little marauder..."

"**Sirius**!" The dark haired man blinked slowly at Remus before glancing around at the crowd they had drawn. Remus tugged Sirius again and led him away through the crowd. Silence was left in their wake and Hermione stared apprehensively at Snape.

"Erm Snape?" she reached out a hand cautiously to lay it on his shoulder but with signs of his future grace and poise he slipped away from her, throwing a scowl over one shoulder.

An hour later Hermione stood awkwardly besides the young Snape again in the small patrol group she had been assigned. Snape, Mad Eye Moody and two burly auror types made up the group – obviously the most experienced. This was going to be dangerous.

"I thought you could handle this." Dumbledore said non-committally when she questioned her placement. Soon people began to filter out of the room, Remus dragging Sirius along still, giving her a warm but exasperated apology when he and Black were the last to leave besides Severus and herself.

Severus sat, hunched forward in the wheelchair staring at anywhere but her. Knowing with anger that she was his only way home. Hermione walked across the pale wooden floorboards of the deserted, shell of a meeting room to stand in front of him.

"It's ho-r-rrible." her voice cracked in the quiet of the room and Severus raised his head to meet her eyes. Seeing tears welling up in her eyes he glanced away again.

"I know." The floodgates opened and tears began rolling down Hermione's face. The exhaustion and tension of everything crashing down on her as she stood shaking in the centre of the little room.

"They're all de-e-ad." she sniffed noisily, ignoring Severus' flinch, "Or-r broken, depressed... Remus is so happy here, I can't take it." One of Severus long pale hands linked their fingers casually, the only comfort Severus knew how to give. Hermione raised her free hand and stroked the light stubble of his cheek. She loved him so much, she couldn't bare it when they were angry with each other.

No apology, she noted silently to herself, he's just going to pretend nothing happened.

Suddenly that was perfectly fine with her as a swift desperation to be loved filled her. She needed to know he cared about her. Hermione lent down quickly, using her hand to tilt his head up and pressed their lips together, her tears catching on his face as they continued to drop. Severus wrapped his arm tightly around her waist, pulling her forward and they crashed into each other, Hermione lifting one leg so she could straddle him where he sat in the chair.

The silence of the cottage echoed around them as Hermione began to rip the front of Severus' shirt open.

* * *

A.N Sorry I'm a stupid wench who doesn't update.


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